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 meh ... use this until dodge unlocks the other one
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are you guys bored of naoki's stories yet?
(No ending time set)
 45%  [ 5 ]
 45%  [ 5 ]
he needs some new ideas
 9%  [ 1 ]
it wouldn't suck if he'd let me work with him
 0%  [ 0 ]
Total Votes : 11

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 08, 2004 5:13 pm   Post subject: meh ... use this until dodge unlocks the other one

I expect nobody to read this, prolly because this is my worst work yet. Nevertheless, I'd just like people to know I'm still alive.

Little Known Fact OTD: my comp sci teacher once won an annual chili cook-off. It was during a routine lunch with his fellow teachers when a women happened to read about a chili contest citywide. She said that the winner would receive a brand new computer with DSL service for 2 years and an external firewall. This obviously pricked up my teacher's ears, and he inquired when he should be there. The woman scoffed at him, saying that he could never make chili spicier and more delicious than Jacob's "Dragontongue" or even One-Tooth Sam's "Nerve Killer". My comp sci teacher wholeheartedly assured her he would win, and went home to begin. After all, he would only have 3 days to make it.

He immediately began reading all his recipe books on chili. Meticulously preparing each dish, he tried at least 30 different kinds, but none held that secret flavor that he knew he needed. They were all too bland, too simple, too hokey to be the one he'd call "A trip to Hell". In fact, the hot peppers he'd been using were sub-par.

Looking on the Internet, he came across a site on Geocities, on the very last page in Google. This site displayed pictures of a peculiar looking pepper, shaped like a human heart. The text said that in ancient times in Venezuela, where the pepper is grown, they would use the pepper's juices to burn through human flesh to get to the heart for sacrificial purposes. The test further said that anybody who wanted to purchase it would have to pay for the lead tank it came enclosed in. The text warned that sudden death could occur if too much was injested raw and would release a burning gas into the atmosphere. My comp sci teacher immediately placed an order for a crate and gleefully waited for the peppers to arrive.

One day, the peppers arrived in their crate. True enough, inside the crate was a lead box with a note on top saying "My God be with you". Casting it aside, he put on his rubber gloves and heaved up the box. Breaking open the dead bolt with a hammer, he peered inside. A bright red blinded his eyes for a second, and then the peppers appeared. The were just like the pictures, a dark red in the shape of a heart. Smoke was coming off the peppers, and they were vibrating very slightly. He had already prepared his own version of chili for the peppers, with ingredients including: coconut milk, 3 roses, beef from a sacred cow who lived in India, a batch of carrots and tomatoes stolen from the Prime Minister's house, and the salt dried from the saltwater at the bottom of the Marianas Trench.

My comp sci teacher tried to cut the peppers, but the knive's evaporated when the blade came in contact with the pepper. Having no choice, he heaved a couple peppers into the pot. Instantly, a column of flame spouted from the mouth, and as the peppers sank to the bottom, bubbles appeared at the surface. When these bubbles popped, they sounded like the screams of a tortured man. The pot's very metal began to leak. At first my teacher assumed it was some of the liquid, but upon closer inspection found a much thinner red liquid, almost as if it were blood! The whole room started shaking and inside the pot, the chili had formed a vacuum in its centre, where things from his kitchen began to become sucked into the abyss.

My comp sci teacher feared for his life. He backed away into the cupboards as the flames licked the air. Out of the corner of his eye, he spotted his most prized treasure, the McKenzie butter, being sucked off the shelf. He dove for it, but it was too late: it had been absorbed into the flaming cavern of the chili pot. My comp sci teacher closed his eyes, and felt so sorry he had attempted to enter this contest. He was just preparing to meet his end when he noticed he didn't feel the vacuum's effect anymore. Looking up, he saw that the objects in his kitchen had settled down, and the chili pot had stopped moving so violently. Crossing slowly across, he peered into the pot, and was astonished that the violent surface was now replaced with a calm red. Though the contents still glowed, it was much more docile now.

It turns out that the McKenzie butter had more powers than he knew. It was able to counter-effect the demonic side-effects of the "Bleeding Heart" and create a creamy smooth chili. Smiling, my comp sci teacher knew he had the perfect chili, and closed the lid. He was ready for the competition.

Will he win? Well of course so. But don't you wanna know the story? Stay tuned tomorrow

PostPosted: Sun Jan 11, 2004 4:36 pm   Post subject: (No subject)

You have quite the imagination.

PostPosted: Sun Jan 11, 2004 4:50 pm   Post subject: (No subject)

They dont bother me cause i dont read them, no offence or anything, but I hate reading creative things if they arent my own, after a few lines I just cant tempt myself to go on

PostPosted: Sun Jan 11, 2004 7:36 pm   Post subject: (No subject)

what imagination? everything naoki says are true... just ask McKenzie if u have doubts
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