Landover Baptist

[Martin]

Unsaved are Unwelcome.
http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

[rdrake]

Those are some of the most narrow minded people I have ever seen.

[Martin]

I don't know, they hit the Homosexual Agenda pretty accurately.

Quote:

8:07 a.m. Make a high protein breakfast while watching the Today show. Wonder if the stories you've heard about Matt Lauer are true. Decide they must be.

....

3:33 p.m. Assume complete control of the U.S., state, and local governments (in addition to other nations' governments); destroy all healthy Christian marriages; recruit all children grades Kindergarten through 12 into your amoral, filthy lifestyle; secure complete control of the media, starting with sitcoms; molest innocent children; give AIDS to as many people as you can; host a pornographic "art" exhibit at your local art museum; and turn people away from Jesus, causing them to burn forever in Hell.

http://www.bettybowers.com/homoagenda.html

[Dan]

This is a joke site right? please tell me it is a joke.

[Amailer]

It is isn't it?

Quote:

Kids Compete for Free iPod Nano in Annual Soul Winning Contest

Anyhow, why post about it? So pointless and (come on) seriously stupid.

[Martin]

Ah, but you're not a fundie are you?

About Us

We are a Bible believing, Fundamentalist, Independent Baptist Church. We are 157,000 members strong. Our Church Campus is located in Freehold, Iowa and rests on 35 acres of some of the most beautiful country you'd ever care to set your eyes upon. Our church holds 28 paid pastors, 131 paid deacons, 412 full time staff members, LCA (Landover Christian Academy), LCU (Landover Christian University), 11 fully equipped chapels, Four 2,000 seat sanctuaries, Three 5,000 seat main sanctuaries, the world's largest Christian Mall, a Christian Amusement Park (Landover Bible Theme Park and Red Sea World), A PGA 18 Hole Golf Course, 3 Fitness Centers, 4 Olympic sized swimming pools, Landover Village, Landover Towers, Landover Retirement Community, Center For 2 Churches On Every City Block Foundation, Leviticus Landing (An Exclusive Gated Executive Christian Community for Platinum Tithersâ„¢), Exodus Acres (Gold Tithers' Gated Community), *27 Developments, Landover All Purpose Multi-Temple, Spa and Resort Center, Fire Department, 100,000 seat amphitheater, 12 Television studios, 2 radio stations, A Christian Circus Camp, Retreat Center for Republican Candidates, 3 Corporate Christian Office Parks, hot springs, 8 cemeteries, and 243 fully certified Christian police officers.

[Dan]

I feal sick...........


Edit: on closer inspection of this site i am in the blife that it is a parody. epsltaly since some of the meta keywords are "parody and religious jokes"

Or from there termes of serivec " The Landover Baptist Church is a complete work of fiction. It is a satire/parody."

[Boo-chan]

Martin wrote:

Ah, but you're not a fundie are you?

About Us

We are a Bible believing, Fundamentalist, Independent Baptist Church. We are 157,000 members strong. blah blah.... 8 cemeteries

So are they counting the people in the cemeteries as members?

A lot of religions' member lists are relatively inaccurate...which is natural I guess. Since they are such kind hearted souls they don't want to consider the fact that some members of their church have forsaken the light... and converted to another religion.

I especially love the Church of LDS which works along the idea that everyone is a believer, its just that some of us are suffering temporary amnesia and don't remember.

[Martin]

Not only that, but Leviticus Landing (An Exclusive Gated Executive Christian Community for Platinum Tithersâ„¢) and Exodus Acres (Gold Tithers' Gated Community)

[codemage]

I've seen the site before; the whole thing is a big parody. It's kind of funny actually. Can't re-check, b/c the site is banned/blocked here.

Re: members. Charities have to have a certain minimum number of members to qualify for various privileges (tax breaks or tax-free status, etc). The charities have to be able to prove their numbers, although the "proof" process is pretty weak, obviously.